My career... and fear of hypochondria

So. I'm graduating in August. I'll be looking for a job. Blah blah. Blather blather. You've heard it all before. But here's my problem: I don't know what I want to be as far as profession goes. I'm trained as an editor. But... I want to go to grad school someday. For a while I had my heart set on getting a masters in children's lit from Simmons College in Boston. Unfortunately, I didn't really think about what it takes to get into grad school until I'd already shot my academic self in the foot. My GPA is not going to endear me to any program. Which means I'll probably have to get the best score ever on the GRE and then get published a hundred times before any school will even look at me. Rats.

I've also been thinking about nursing. I've been thinking about it for a couple of years, actually. There are a few programs around that are just for people who already have their bachelor degree. You take the prerequisites, then do the program (12-18 mts) and then you have your RN. That whole thing would take about two years. Unfortunately, chemistry is NOT my strong point, and I would definitely have to take chemistry.

But before I try to sneak my way into a grad program or start healing the sick--I should probably work. Because then I might know what I really want to do. Theorizing is great, but sometimes very unhelpful.

And also: I'm worried that I'm a hypochondriac. I've known quite a few in my life and feel a general sort of disdain for the whole philosophy. But maybe I'm a hypochondriac too. No! Please nooo! I hurt my knee last week because I got a little overzealous about getting into running again. I thought it was just a little tendinitis, but today my knee hurts in a new and curious way. So I'm going to the health center tomorrow. I want to make sure I didn't tear something or... something. Does that sound wussy to you? It sounds a little wussy to me.

What has happened to me? I'm a directionless nutcase with a bum knee.

Please, don't judge.

Overcast

I have not been looking forward to the spring and summer. I got quite attached to winter. The cold, the clouds, the snow, the layers and layers of clothes, the early evenings. I didn't want to give that up. Everyone was talking about how sick they were of winter, but I was resentful that spring and summer had to show up. But today the weather was cordial, the sky Crayola blue, the leaves green--and I decided that perhaps spring and summer wouldn't be so bad. I remembered why I like those seasons.

I guess none of this is too surprising. I'm usually drawn to gloomier weather (which really doesn't seem "gloomy" to me at all, but actually quite lovely). The top two places I want to go (as far as geography, not as in family) are Wales and Alaska.

Growing up in the Northwest means lots of rain about nine months out of the year. I've known quite a few people that find all that "moisture" (thank you, Utah colloquialisms) to be depressing. But if you grew up with it, or were born with it (I was born in California, but I don't claim it), you're used to it. You like it, even. The same could probably be said for the Sahara Desert. Maybe.

Priscilla Ahn

I just discovered her music today. I am in love.

Dream

Lullaby

Living in a Tree

Please enjoy.