Kris Kringle

I saw Santa Claus today. Kegan and I were walking into Macey's for some bread and THERE HE WAS. Longish white hair, long white beard, pot-belly. He was pushing a shopping cart and wearing a t-shirt and jeans, but I wasn't fooled. Please. Who does he think he is? Clark Kent?

I've seen a couple other Santa candidates in my time. One was a substitute teacher I had a number of times in one of my art classes in high school. I think he was into ceramics. His beard was kind of yellowish and he smelled like wood, old coffee, the occasional cigar and the habit of patchy bathing. Then there was the donut-eater. He came in nearly everyday that I worked in the bakery at Thriftway. He would buy one or two donuts and often ate them before even getting to the cash register. He smelled. BAD. Talk about ripe. Bathing wasn't even patchy for him, I'm pretty sure it just didn't happen. However, he did sport a white beard.

I guess it's kind of unfortunate that none of Santa's other characteristics stand out to me while observing him attempting to be incognito. Like cheery laugh or rosy cheeks or generous personality, etc. But the beard is pretty dominant. If I had a blue afro two feet in diameter, you probably wouldn't think of my other characteristics either, especially if you saw someone else with blue hair. It's to be expected.

I don't remember when I stopped believing in Santa, but I think I got suspicious early on. I remember Kyle (my brother who's four years older than I am) telling me that he didn't believe in Santa, but he believed in elves--because he'd seen them. I also remember Maren (my middle sister) saying that when she had children, once they stopped believing in Santa, they wouldn't get presents from him anymore (my mom didn't really go for that, but I would always assure her that I still believed, I still do). Now on Christmas morning my mom says gleefully, "Oh look! Santa came!" and I, just as gleefully, reply, "Santa! He came!" I'm covering my bases just in case my mom suddenly decides that Maren had the right idea.

I want to start carrying a camera with me so that I can document any future Santa sightings I have. Seen any good Santas lately?